barney stinson, himym, how I met your mother, marshall eriksen, the slap, the wedding -

The Slapate Kid

Get it? Marshall? “Marshall Arts?”
Okay.

HIMYM once again prequels the slap of all slaps, with a very riveting slap-prenticeship story on behalf of Marshall Eriksen, who somehow trained in Shanghai (and Cleveland) for over a year in order to become a Slap master. Goes to show what happens when you take legendary consultation from an eight year old.

Confused yet? Read on.

Marshall, in an effort to scare Barney with his slapability, retold the story of how he gained his slapping prowess and superiority: by training under the tutelage of the three Slap Masters: Red Bird, White Flower, and…The Calligrapher. They maintain the creeds of Speed, Strength, and Accuracy, respectively. And they all mysteriously retired and did not physically age beyond approximately 32. 

Red Bird instilled Speed with the slapprentice; then, atop Slap Mountain, deep in the Slapalachian range, White Flower taught him Strength. The Calligrapher accidentally died, but he was able to give Marshall a succinct explanation of how to aim first.

All to focus Marshall’s energy into his fourth slap, The Slap, for Barney Stinson.

The episode finished with a tear-jerking, soul-filling rendition of You Just Got Slapped, followed by a slap montage (a slaptage) of all the HIMYM slap footage on record.

And that’s still with one slap left.

We don’t have much left of the series HIMYM. How will Marshall fulfill his last slap? Will he have the time before Robin and Barney take their slap-vows on their slap-wedding day? At the slapel? By the slap in next to the slapping shore? 

Yes, okay, I’m done. Promise.

 

Favorite quotes include:

“Huh. That is much [gold].” - Bar owner

“I wasn’t held slaptive in Shanghai.” - Marshall

“The Punishing Scholarship of White Flower.”

“Brooooo.” - The Calligrapher (and most definitely not Ted)

 

Next episode: Barney cannot tell a lie. Really, that’s all you need to know to get excited.


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